Despite what social media influencers may want us to believe, we don’t actually have to document everything about our daily lives. It is okay to just exist. Whether you call it downtime or a sabbath, build intentional screen-free times into your week.
Technology has drastically changed the way we live, for better and for worse. Sometimes we look around and realize that everyone is staring at their phones and not engaging with one another, or we are all watching a live event through a screen as we record. If you are like me, you are wondering how to live in a digital age while still making real memories with your family and friends. I want to be present for the great moments but not shun technology altogether. There are some ways that we can use our devices to enhance our experiences, and there are some times when we need to set aside the phone and live in the moment.
Using Technology
Family Yearbooks
One of my family's favorite traditions is making our annual family yearbook. Using an online photo storage site, we upload our pictures to create a book of highlights from the year. We choose to upload our photos into twelve albums, one per month, and our yearbook is in chronological order by month, but you could organize yours in any way that works best for your family memories. My kids love to select pictures from each month to be included in the book. When the year is over and the book is complete, we order a hard copy and all enjoy flipping through it and reminiscing on the year.
We tell stories and laugh at pictures and have a good time thinking back through the memories that have been triggered by the pictures. My more sentimental child looks through these books regularly. We have them out on the fireplace mantel, one book for every year since our oldest child was born. The kids like to see pictures from when they were little and hear the stories that go with them. For the pictures that they remember, they like to be the ones to tell the stories. My husband and I like to look at the books on occasion to remember all of the great times and fun things we have been able to do. Some quick pictures on my phone have led to over a decade's worth of family yearbooks that we all cherish.
Art Books
Another photo book that I make is an art book for my kids’ artwork. I make one for every year or two of school, just depending on how much artwork they make in a given year. If you have a preschool or elementary school child, you know just how much artwork comes home every week. Rather than stuffing drawers full of papers or feeling bad sneaking artwork into the trash, I celebrate my child’s creation, take a picture of it, then have them place it in recycling. They know that Mom is not going to keep a billion things laying around, but they don’t feel neglected because they also know an art book is coming.
At the end of the school year, I make a photo book that includes every single piece of artwork that they made that year. One book per child, masterpieces, and scribbles. We love these books. It is so fun to see their art from when they were little and how they have grown and developed in their skills. I am so thankful for all of the easy-to-use online photo book companies that have allowed me to keep, in digital form, every piece of art my kids have ever made. The only hard copies I keep are things like handprints because I want to capture the size and very special pieces. Other than that, into the photo book it goes, and I will cherish it for years to come!
Long-Distance Relationships
My husband and I live several states away from our families of origin. Growing up down the street from my grandparents, our long-distance life sometimes hurts my heart for our children. I wish they could ride their bikes to grandma’s like I did. I wish they could have regular cousin get-togethers like my husband did with his same-age cousins. While we could settle for mourning that loss, we instead use technology to our advantage. My kids have regular video chats with their grandparents, aunts and uncles, and cousins. They text with their cousins frequently. They are even in a fantasy football league together. They may not get as much time together physically as I would like for them to, but they are still deeply part of each other’s lives. They are making memories through conversation just like they would if they were in the same room. They are able to play video games together and talk about their days at school. My husband and I get the same benefit with our parents and long-distance friends. Using technology for regular video chats has been a great way to continue to make memories with our loved ones who are far from us.
Games
Using technology to play games is a great memory-maker! We were recently waiting for an event to begin and had arrived quite early to get seats. It was hot and boring and my family quickly began to lose patience. I noticed a group of friends nearby who were playing an interactive charades-type game with their phones. Genius! Your waiting doesn’t have to consist of everyone sitting around and individually staring at their devices. You can use that time to play games and make memories. What is a better story in the future– that time we waited hours for the fireworks to start and it was terribly boring and we didn’t even talk? Or that time we played charades and Mom acted like a ballerina elephant in front of all of those people?
Avoiding Technology
Designated Screen-free Times
We don’t want to always rely on technology to enhance our memory-making experiences because sometimes it distracts us from the moment. We should intentionally avoid technology for short times to focus on the present. Set aside some time to view life through your actual eyes rather than through a screen. Despite what social media influencers may want us to believe, we don’t actually have to document everything about our daily lives. It is okay to just exist. Whether you call it downtime or a sabbath, build intentional screen-free times into your week. Focus on making memories that are just memories and can’t be verified by a picture or a video. Maybe everyone’s version of that day is different. Maybe you tell the story years later and no one agrees on who really said the funny joke or what actually fell off the table. That’s ok. Memories are fluid and that makes it fun.
Keep Telling Stories
Throughout history, memories have been kept through storytelling. Let’s not lose this tradition just because we have easy access to pictures and videos. Language engages our brain in different ways than looking at images. Sitting around the dinner table, lounging in the living room, or driving in the car are wonderful opportunities to relive moments through story. Ask your friends or family members to share a special story about something meaningful or funny that happened to them. When planning your next family vacation, recall your favorite memories from the last vacation. Ask your kids to tell you the best part and worst part of their school day. We can prolong and cherish memories through storytelling. We don’t need the digital age to keep our memories for us, but we can harness its power to cherish those memories.
Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/vejaa
Megan Moore is a military spouse and mom of 3 (through birth and adoption). A speech-language pathologist by training, she now spends her time moving around the country every couple of years. She is passionate about special needs, adoption, and ice cream.
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